I'm so lonely.
Ralph commented that the pattern of my blog goes from "I love being here!" to "But I'm really tired of it and I don't get it" to "I think I'm figuring it out" therefore "I love being here!" It felt a little harsh but it's probably an accurate description of my life here. If that is the cycle, I am at the low point again. Word of advice: if you are going to self-immerse yourself in a culture, remember that we all need friends. Maybe even a friend who speaks our language and can understand the experience.
If this is the lonely, dark night, I take consolation in the fact that thus far my emotions have gone in a circle and so I will eventually swing back up to loving it here. Hopefully.
This is the part where I honestly ask for encouragement.
7 comments:
If I knew what to write, I would, but have lost the ability to say encouraging things without being sarcastic; You're not alone, and if I could be there I would.
Say, I would gladly have accepted your help making bread tonight. I can't believe I'm still up and that I wasn't on the computer earlier! Hopefully the circle is swinging toward the daylight and it will be a beautiful sunny day to match your kind heart. It's truly a balance of enjoying the quiet of the weekend after the business of the week. You can do it!
Love you!
Ellen, I know EXACTLY how you feel. Just having one good friend to share the living abroad experience with would make a world of difference. It does help to keep busy, even just going for a walk or reading a good book brighten my day! Things always get better eventually, but hopefully things start improving for you sooner rather than later!
Suggestion - color some pictures -color one to express how you feel now, color another to express the last time you were in love with Spain.
Realize you are loved and missed and valued.
Get excited by the fact that I will be back overseas before you leave Spain, even if it means I'm in Slovakia.
Ellen, I can empathize with you. Loneliness was one of the things I struggled with most this summer.
I don't think I have any groundbreaking advice, but I find that when I feel lonely and homesick, the best thing to do is go out and do something, not to stay in. (no matter how tempted I may be to do so!)
Before I left for Sevilla, my high school Spanish teacher told me that if I felt homesick, I should go do something awesome that I could only do in Spain... it helps you to get your mind off of what you can't currently have and reminds you to enjoy what you do have, while you have it.
And in the meantime, just try to be connected to the people there.
I believe in you Ellen! And you have my prayers. I know you'll swing out of this funk soon! I hope you enjoy a beautiful, relaxing Saturday! :)
I drew a picture and listened to my favorite songs to get through a low day yesterday. That's all I know to do!
Ayudame, por favor! Do you know a way to remember when to use "a" as a preposition? I guess I don't understand how to use prepositions in general!
AnnRae - are you RaeAnn?
I'm assuming you are talking about "a" as a preposition in Spanish because "a" isn't a preposition in English, it's an indefinite article. "I've got a cow." Not specific, like one cow or two, just a cow. Or "Do you have a pencil?" Not the pencil, just any pencil.
In Spanish, "a" is used as a preposition when you are talking about "to". I'm going to school. Voy a la escuela.
My simplest understanding of a preposition comes from my dear 9th grade English teacher. She explained that you can test if a word is a preposition when you think about the phrase "___ the tree trunk." "On the tree trunk", "To the tree trunk" Under, around, near, by, for, across.
Does this help?
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